Monday, 22 September 2008

It's all explained here.

Freshly nicked from Dickiebo's blog:

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People– What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station loo because this one is just too icky.
You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

In spite of all the above, I wouldn't trade my second X chromosome for one of those pesky Y ones.

15 comments:

Kirstine said...

And if you find that as many as 3 of these don't apply to you, you can claim to be in touch with your feminine side!

(Posted on behalf of my husband.)

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

That last one is so true of my brother! Before he married, he used to hit Wal-mart at midnight on Christmas Eve.

Doorman-Priest said...

Men can multi-task: I can watch T.V. read the sports pages and ignore my wife all at the same time.

Under there... said...

Wow! I was not feeling especially grateful today until I read this list. Now I am overhwlemed with gratitude. However, I do have some strange strap problems when I wear an alb and cincture.

jenniferw said...

Ain't that the truth? I love being a girl. Those are pretty funny, Anne.

dickiebo said...

I find it all soooo real!

Jay said...

HAHAHA!!! That's so funny. I especially like 'the world is your urinal' and ... oh, too many. I can't remember to quote them!

But 'you can open all your jars yourself'? Not always so, my friend. OH is always struggling with them. He never, ever asks for help, of course, but if I'm in the kitchen I'll just take the jar from him without a word and hand it back opened. He hates that. LOL!

dickiebo said...

When you have a few mo’s to spare, and nothing special to do, would you please visit my site and be so kind as to accept a special Award for your blog. Thanks.

AnneDroid said...

Thank you very much Dickiebo. I really appreciate it. Axxx

Anonymous said...

The writer of this nonsense obviously never suffered from depression.

For some of the reasons men get depression I suggest you get hold of a copy of David Seamands' book Healing for Damaged Emotions, ISBN 9781850786764, available from (of all places) Tesco Books:

http://www.tesco.com/books/product.aspx?R=9781850786764
.

Alfred of Wessex (who can't be bothered with this registration business any more).

AnneDroid said...

Oh, Alfred of Wessex, I do apologise if I've caused offence by posting this, which I just thought was funny and clever. I know that of course men DO get depression - I know some who have it currently, but didn't think how this might make them feel. As I say my apologies.

I've read the book you mention, though some time ago. Thanks for posting all that information about it for anyone who would find it helpful.

Peace.

Anonymous said...

Anne

No apology required on your part. Even if your posting of someone else's drip, drip, drip of anti-male propaganda did offend me, how I reacted is my responsibility, not yours.

The Peace of the Lord be with you and yours also.

Alfred of Wessex

AnneDroid said...

Cheers, Alfred - how kind of you. I won't get into an undignified online argument about whose responsibility it is! Maybe we could agree to share it in some amicable way...! I'm sure I visited your blog in the past, but can't find it now. I wonder if you've retired. Anyway, you're welcome here any time.

kirstine - tell your husband I like that comment!

Baino said...

OK I stole it but . . .
We got off the Titanic first.
We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
Taxis stop for us.
We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo.
We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
We have the ability to dress ourselves.
We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
We will never regret piercing our ears.
There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway.

AnneDroid said...

I thought Michael Phelps carried off the Speedo rather well this summer, baino. Some of these are very funny. Thanks!